Letter to a Dear Friend, Tony Te

Hi, Tito Tony. I have to admit that when I saw you last night, you didn't look like how I remember last seeing you. You lost a lot of weight! But I also have to say that skinhead suited you well--which I wouldn't have known if I didn't come to see you after such a long time. I'm going to be sentimental here--maybe too little, too late--but I want to take this time to recall the snippets from the four years I had known you.

You probably don't know this, but I had known you longer than you had known me. I remember--circa 2008, Victory Pioneer was just starting then and Pastor Luther Mancao was leading the congregation, when my family (Me, my brother and mom) had started attending the services there. You caught my attention right away because of this tiny kid who looked strikingly like you, and was working as an usher. I had thought immediately that he's probably your son. I thought then, "Hey! It's nice that he makes his kid do volunteer work and not look down on his (Simon) being young. I like him already!" which appealed to my heart for the young people, so I looked up to you right away. See? You had yet to even know me then, but you've already made an indelible impression on me as a young person.

A year later, when I finished Victory weekend, I also started volunteering and had the privilege of interacting with you in the morning services. I can't remember much of our interactions then, but I do remember being so emboldened in faith every time by your encouragements when you go up on stage to briefly share about generosity. As a student, I remember faithfully giving tithes because of what you shared that he who can be trusted with so little will be entrusted with much. And your life was a testimony of that promise!  Yet you led a humble life in Pioneer, serving as an usher with Simon, not even calling attention to yourself.

Eventually, I worked full time in the ministry beginning summer of 2010. That was when we were (finally) formally introduced to each other. Helping manage the services and events at that time paved way for me to be able to talk to you personally. The awesome thing was, the Tony onstage who everyone admired as he encouraged people was ten times more admirable when he stepped off it. It was what you did offline that really caused major impact on me--the times when you asked me how I was and took time to talk to me and listen to me, or not making me feel I was too young to be having a discussion about politics were just a few of them. Even in Facebook, when you called out my posts that were not so honoring God, I knew they were prompted by a leader, a friend, a spiritual father, a man of God. And you were a teacher--in a large setting, and in a small group setting--sharing generously what you know of God in all the opportunities given to you: the pulpit, retreat sessions, classroom setting, bible studies, and most importantly, as a friend.

Then it happened--if I remember it correctly, some time in 2012 when the by-congregation meetings during leaders convergence had just begun (we were part of the 9 and 11 AM group), you took a "leave" from the group to start your treatment. It wasn't clear to me then the severity of your sickness, but my faith about it was firm--you will recover, healed completely by God. Interestingly, though you were not around in the services anymore, your countenance and your family's had never changed--the joy and strength of the Lord had always been there. And you were still the pundit Facebook poster that I followed; you weren't posting as much, but still making impact in what you shared online. Even then, we had discussions about God and current events. I observed how you and your family handled this season, and I only saw GOD every. Single. Time. That was two years ago. Embarrassingly, from my end, time passed and  our interactions lessened. But nary a moment did I doubt your recovery. Even recently when I saw your photo with Tita Vicky, celebrating your 16th wedding anniversary in the hospital, it wasn't fear but faith that got stirred still--you're well on your way to complete healing.

Our Father did give you His healing--giving you a totally new body, granting you the peace from the pain of the sickness. It wasn't our idea of healing, but it was God's sovereign hands at work, no doubt.

Hearing about it last Sunday was one thing, but to see you last night hit me like an emotional truck that I didn't expect--I lost a leader I looked up to, a spiritual father, a really good friend. Yet, there was such an overwhelming spirit of joy and peace surrounding your room; and like how you brought people together during leadership convergences, or during ministry celebrations, you have once again brought people together last night. Even in your physical death, you and your family remain to be a testimony of faith and hope. We all saw that God truly was the center of your family, and He held all of you together--most especially now that you're not with them anymore.

Pondering about it last night, I wondered about those days you were away from everyone's eyes, and only God was privy to your heart and mind--I saw a modern day Paul. I'm sure it wasn't easy--there's no glory in fighting a deadly sickness EXCEPT when God is honored. And that's what I saw--what we all saw. You have fought a good fight of faith, and you have finished the race that God marked out for you. This is not a lost battle, this is yet another victory in God's growing list of faith-building testimonies. This may not be for me to declare, but I believe you lived your life to the full because you lived it out for God. Your life's greatest legacies are your family, and these memories created with different people while you trotted this world, all of which far exceeds the worth of any physical treasure there is.

Tito Tony, I'm sorry I'm sharing this only now. If there's one thing I regret about your passing, it's that I never told you that you have been good to me. I'm not sure if it would've made so much of a difference if you did know, because you probably have heard it more than once from a lot of people from the different seasons of your life. Maybe I write this more for myself, because I want to be able to recall what a great person you were, to make a record of what I can still remember and to ensure that I will never forget it. But my agenda ultimately is I want to be able to share what a great person you had been even to an individual, you couldn't careless whether it was given significance to or not, and it was all compelled by your unquestionable love of God.

We will see you in eternity! I am so sure you're having a blast with God right this very moment! But while we're all here, a little jealous of you because you finally have the privilege of seeing Abba Father face to face, we will all stick like family to Tita Vicky, Andy and Simon.

I praise God for your life, and the awesome privilege of being brushed by it briefly. You will be missed here on earth, definitely. Until we meet again. :)

Sincerely,

Lai